Authenticity and Coconut Oil

First, I'd like to thank all of my readers for just even glancing at this silly, nonsensical blog. I love to read and I love to write. Little by little, I'm finding my voice and center through writing; and I want to extend my gratitude to those who have shown support, offered genuine advice, and encouraged me through whatever demon I am battling. And the previous post Jogging and Ketogenic Eating got over 200 views/reads in one day! Wowsers! Y'all rock!

So in addition to getting physically healthy, I need to grow up emotionally. Seven things I want to work on in particular:

1. Have a realistic perception of reality--at times my anxiety blows certain situations out of proportion and apparently, everyone suffers from this attack of unwarranted worries/fears. That is the thing of fears....you think you're protecting yourself, playing it safe, but you're actually missing out on happiness.

2. Be accepting of myself and other people-- many times I want people to conform and adhere to my preconceived notions of how a good person ought to behave. Gossip, slander, rumors. Petty people talk down on others; authentic people raise others. I am more petty than I am authentic. Funny thing is....as rude and mean as I am to those I feel are "wronging" me, I am immensely harsh and mean to myself. 

3. Be thoughtful-- most times I am so consumed by my own tragedies and problems, I don't even realize my potential to truly help another person in sticky situations or even just be a friend who is there. 

4. Have a non-hostile sense of humor-- I am a mean girl. A handful of laughs at the expense of another person. 

5. Be able to express my emotions freely and CLEARLY- Most times I can express my emotions pretty well but not so much clearly. But there have been many times when I will shut down when it's most important to say what I'm feeling....to say I'm sorry....to ask for forgiveness or even for help. Saying you need someone else's help is expressing emotion-feelings of helplessness, trust, love, etc.

6. Be open to learning from my mistakes--this one is hard. I am stubborn...real stubborn. I have a hard time adjusting to change. I will live a mistake just because I can't learn to be or do better because I'm comfortable where I am and progress is painful. 

7. Understand what motivates me--Dallace and I used to sit under the moon and stars chatting about life. About me. I would be frustrated at people or situations or things not falling into place and he would always ask, "Sabrina, why do you even do the things you do? Or allow people to treat you in such a way? Why do you write....do you even remember the very first moment you discovered you loved writing? Do you do things for approval? Do you do things to make other people's lives better? Why?" he would ask. And with no thought whatsoever, I'd blurt out the generic answers available on the surface of my mind...and he'd say to those random blurts, "No, think hard about it...think until it hurts and your mind is lost..then maybe you'll find your answers..."

Authenticity takes work and practice. Just like anything else worth learning in life.  So little steps. My goal is to work on #1 this week and work on alternating traits each week. So diet, exercise, and developing the traits of authentic person. 

P.S. If you're doing the ketogenic diet and consume coconut oil.....be careful and ease into that shit....cuz you will shit for a while if you overdo it the first time you add it to your diet.