Dare to be Left With Nothing

It is day six of the keto diet and I have lost eight pounds. Day one, two, and three sucked so bad. My stomach groaned and protested all three days, feeling betrayed and in shock. The stomach wanted bread, pasta, and rice ever so badly! It threw tantrums, leaving me in the potty for longer periods of time as I tried to convince it that everything would be okay and worth it in the end. But it resisted, crying out for cupcakes, candy, and more carbohydrates. The sticky, sugary, and decadent kind of carbs. It reached out to pastries in stores, and gazed longingly at the rice in our pantry, begging for just one piece, one little morsel. 

Goal: Get back to here

But I resisted those first three days No, stomach!! We are doing this! We are cutting off the poison that is weighing us down! We are cutting out the toxicity once and for all, cold turkey! This is the only way to get over an addiction. Eliminate our need and desire for it! And we stuck to it. Because who wants to live consuming poison for life, unable to take control and enjoy the rest of what the universe has to offer? We have to learn to embrace better, healthier options. The stomach still revolts every now and then but after day four, I felt better. Things were easier, and it's actually kind of fun experimenting with cooking that is carb-free. 

The funniest, queerest thing is learning how to say NO to offers of sweet treats. It feels kind of boujie, saying, "No, I can't eat that; too much sugar..." People look at you like, "Oh really, bitch?" And you just move along, distancing yourself from the temptation and tacit looks of admiration mixed with envy.

But eight pounds down! Too often we let our addictions and attachment to things and people control us and the quality of our life drops. You make poor life decisions, your esteem goes to shit, and you walk around in a foggy daze wondering who you are and how you came to this awful, torturous phase in your life as you succumb to the control your addictions. Pound after pound clinging to you, face getting puffy beyond recognition, and a sickness growing in your soul. Cut out the addiction, and you find yourself again. Drop eight pounds and love yourself again. Because you are in control now. You have taken your life back. You can find happiness. 

"Dare to be left with nothing, to connect to something new."